LBW: Nursing

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I’m going to start this by saying my nursing story is not the norm. It’s not as unusual as one might think, but it’s definitely not the norm. One thing I have learned from my 5 months of parenting experience (I’m totes a pro now, you know) is that holy bejeezus it’s hard. It’s so hard. There are a million different ways for it to be hard. It’s hard for you in a way that might be unique to the people you know, but it’s definitely not unique to the world of parenting. I am totally digressing. This is not about you and your struggles, this is a recap of the two months of total misery that I experienced. LET ME TELL YOU MY TALE OF WOE.

So, yeah. The few days in the hospital are a total blur to me now. I remember Wade not wanting to nurse at first. He projectile spit up this horrible black liquid…it was straight out of The Exorcist, I tell you. They assured us that was normal – he had just swallowed amniotic fluid and his stomach was full, so it had to get cleared out before he would nurse. So he didn’t really eat anything the first day. That led to him dropping nearly a full pound in the first 24 hours.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

I don’t have any pictures of him nursing in the hospital.

Like I said…the rest of the stay is a blur. Every time a lactation consultant from the hospital would come in and try to help me get him to nurse, it would be different advice. For some reason or another we settled on the “football hold” as the best method of feeding. idk why/how that happened. But that’s pretty much the nursing position we used throughout our adventure together.

The next two weeks…also a blur. We went home. I’d feed Wade whenever he cried, I guess? I really don’t remember. I just know it took him AGES to nurse. I had no idea this was unusual – I had never breastfed a baby before, or really been around anyone that was breastfeeding. Especially a newborn. But he would for real nurse for an hour on one side, then another 30 minutes on the other. And then he’d sleep for an hour or more. Which, everyone says that newborns are supposed to nurse ever two-three hours. I was like “How the frick is this supposed to work? As soon as he’s done nursing he’s supposed to start nursing again?!” So he definitely wasn’t nursing as often as he should. Which contributed to his weight loss and my supply problems, I’m sure.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

This is his 1 Week picture. SO TINY.

We went to his two-week checkup and he still wasn’t back up to his original birth weight. I think he was within 5oz? The doctor didn’t seem too concerned, but did want us to come back after a week to see how things were going. I had read that it usually takes 2-3 weeks for everything to get settled with breastfeeding, but that if it still hurt at that point to go to a lactation consultant to make sure the baby was latching correctly and didn’t have any tongue/lip ties. It was still a bit painful when Wade initially latched, so I figured I’d go ahead and swing by the hospital’s lactation office to get things checked out.

Dude. The lactation consultant kind of freaked out over the fact that he wasn’t up to his birth weight. She also told me he should not be nursing for so long. She immediately gave him 2oz of formula, told me I should be taking fenugreek supplements, and gave us a new nursing routine. I now had to nurse for no more than…I think it was 10 minutes?…on each side, then supplement with 2oz of formula or expressed breast milk, and then pump until I was empty. I was like…I just wanted to make sure his latch was okay!! I called the doctor to verify that I really needed to start doing this, since he hadn’t seem overly concerned about Wade’s weight. He deferred to the consultant’s recommendation.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

A great example of a horrible latch.

I was like…no. So I reached out to my doula and asked her if she knew of a lactation consultant I could use. She directed me to a woman who came out to our house. She basically did the same thing the one at the hospital had done – said he wasn’t getting enough and that I should nurse, supplement, and pump for every feeding. I believe she recommended up to 20 minutes on each side, though. As if that was better.

So, fine. That’s what I did. For two weeks. And it was pure hell. I tried to be really positive about it, and not complain. Mind over matter and all that. But it was rough. People telling me it was rough did not help, for the record. That was something I struggled with for the first three months. I really didn’t appreciate people telling me how much I was struggling, or how difficult it was, or how they had struggled, or how much easier it would be if I switched to formula. I mean, yes – the glorious relief of giving up was overwhelming, and life got a million times better after I did (spoiler alert, we don’t breastfeed anymore). But still. I was trying really hard to stay motivated and look for the light at the end of the tunnel. Everyone telling me how awful things were did not help. I’m going to try really hard to not do that to other new moms. End side rant, lol!

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

The good thing about it was that Todd could get involved with feeding him!

Anyway. It was awful. Do you know how hard it is to maintain that schedule? Then Wade started to refuse to latch. He would pull off and cry. I would offer the bottle and he would immediately start drinking. So then I would cry. And call Todd. I was definitely hysterical more than once. And I would cry when Todd left for work. We both kind of have some sort of PTSD from this time…he’s still pretty firmly convinced we should never have another baby, because I was such a wreck. >.<

I finally called another IBCLC that had come highly recommended from a breastfeeding support group I had joined on Facebook. (I cannot recommend enough joining parenting groups – they have kept me sane.) If you are in the Middle TN area and looking for an IBCLC you have got to go to her. She was a game. changer. I called her on a Friday and maaaay have started crying when I left the voicemail. (And Wade was definitely crying in the background. lol!) She scheduled a meeting with me on that Saturday because she could tell how desperate I was.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

Me nursing at a friend’s wedding. Seriously…that’s a horrible latch. Poor baby. Poor boobs.

She was shocked about how much the first lactation consultant had freaked out over Wade’s weight, and assured me that he was most likely doing fine at that point. New research has shown that women who were on IV while in labor tend to have babies with a lot of water weight due to all the fluids. I think hospitals in other countries are even waiting 24 hours before they take the baby’s official “birth weight” just to make sure they’ve flushed out all that water weight.

Wade had a severe underbite that everyone before had commented on, but told me would get better in time. Something to do with the plates in a baby’s head shifting in the birth canal, blah blah blah. While this is true, she pointed out that it would obviously have a negative impact on the breastfeeding experience and was so severe that it could be hiding a tongue tie (I had been assured by every other LC that he did not have one). So she sent me to a massage therapist for a cranial massage. It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen – after an hour of working with him, the therapist had shifted stuff around enough that his jaw had moved forward significantly. Then we went back to the IBCLC and she was like “Oh, yeah – he’s got a tongue tie.”

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

I always joked that Wade would “self-censor” nursing sessions by throwing his arm over my boob. Look at how long he was!!

So then we had to go to Chattanooga to get a tongue-tie revision. At this point I had already started back at work, so everything was super difficult. The doctor there told me his tie was one of the thickest ones she’d seen in a long time. The change in nursing was IMMEDIATE and AMAZING. I almost cried. Wade and I never got his latch back to that perfect glorious moment, but it did get at least somewhat better after that.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

The last nursing session before the revision, and the one immediately after. Look at the difference in latch!!

By this point, my supply was destroyed. I have no clue if it could’ve been saved had I gone to a good IBCLC sooner…so many things went wrong – the first day of not nursing, followed by two weeks of nursing poorly, followed by two weeks of listening to janky advice… His revision wasn’t corrected until he was already two months old. I had tried SO many supplements. Fenugreek, blessed thistle, reglan, domperidone…I don’t know what else. I ate oatmeal every day. I drank a TON of water. I drank Mother’s Milk Tea. I ate everything anyone even kind of suggested might boost supply. But Wade kept dropping percentiles. He was gaining weight, but dropping percentiles.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

This was at the doctor’s office when we went back for his two-week checkup post-revision.

He dipped down below the 10th percentile and that’s when I called it quits. I kept telling myself that as long as things were getting better I’d keep trying. And a little thing would happen here, and then another there… The final thing was the tie revision. EVERYTHING rode on that, and his weight gain after it. And after…two? three?…weeks – nothing. I couldn’t do it anymore. I felt like I was starving him. I dreaded breastfeeding. The god-awful routine of supplement, nurse, pump was about to drive me insane.

And then – AND THEN – my supply got worse. I was back at work full-time and where I had been pumping about 4oz a session when I was working part-time, now I didn’t even get 2oz. I had a hardcore ugly-cry session in my pumping room once that happened. Like…UGLY CRY. So I called it. I was done.

Well, I was going to give it one more month. I must be a masochist. I was giving it one more month to see if he would gain weight. I upped his supplement from 1oz to 2oz. And then two days later he totally refused to nurse. He wasn’t fussy about it – he would just…stop. He’d pull off, look at me, and grin. No matter how many times I tried to get him to latch, that’s all he would do. It’s like he was saying “Okay, Mom – that’s enough. We both need to make a change.”

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

Our opinion of this whole “nursing” thing…

So I switched to bottle-feeding him full-time. He gained FIVE OUNCES in three days. He hadn’t gained that much in a WEEK prior to that. I only pumped to relieve the pressure. I only leaked once on the first day. I had NEVER leaked breastmilk the entire time I had been breastfeeding. Not once. The first day after we’d given up my right side had a small trickle. I only pumped about once every…6-8 hours?…for I think like 3 days. And then I didn’t need to pump anymore. My boobs were sore, and got kind of hard. But they never got red or showed any other signs of mastitis or anything. Within a week they had totally deflated. Which is super depressing to look at in the mirror, let me tell you… lol!

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

I circled the two data points that show the weight gain after stopping nursing.

Wade is now 5 months old. He’s in the 90th percentile in height, and the 20th in weight. He’s 26.5 inches tall, and 14lbs 6oz. And he’s the most perfect baby on the planet.

LBW: Nursing | The Wilson Buzz

I love him so hard.

40 Before 40: First Draft

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This is just gonna be a stream-of-consciousness as a way to get started on my “40 Before 40” list… Some of them are vague, and I can guarantee this list will change a lot over the next…12 years. lol! I don’t want them to be too kid-focused, like “teach the kids how to <do something>” because I totally want this to be all about me. It’s my list, darnit! My kids can have their own “10 Before 10” list if they want to. :P I’m also not into death-defying things, like skydiving or bungee-jumping. Mr. T convinced me to add parasailing, but I’m iffy on that one. lol!

  1. Pop out a couple of babies.
  2. Adopt?
  3. Mr. T gets a vasectomy.
  4. I get Lasik.
  5. I get a boob job. (Oh, yes.)
  6. Travel to Europe.
  7. Family trip to Disney World.
  8. Family cross-country road trip.
  9. Foster at least 10 dogs. (NOT all at once, obviously.)
  10. Build my own computer.
  11. Own a 3D printer.
  12. Learn to play an instrument – ukulele?
  13. Have at least 5 hard-core, balls-to-the-wall, day-long (possibly full weekends?), super extravagant spa days. #treatyoself
  14. Read at least 50 books a year, on average. (so 500 books)
  15. Full kitchen/dining room renovation, including new appliances.
  16. Build out the sunroom/deck thing that Mr. T is always talking about.
  17. Own a Jeep Wrangler. (just for you, Mr. T!)
  18. Buy a new car for Sarah. (possibly electric?)
  19. Some sort of ladies’ retreat with a handful of friends.
  20. “Mommy & Me” overnight trips one-on-one with each child (separately), at least once a year.
  21. “Couple’s Retreat” overnight trips without the kids at least once a year.
  22. Sew cool stuff.
  23. Build cool stuff.
  24. Learn to crochet and/or knit.
  25. Do yoga (possibly Pilates?) “consistently” (at least 5 days a week?) for at least a month – ideally get into a routine where it is done regularly for always.
  26. Join a gym/get a personal trainer, for at least…6 consecutive months.
  27. Learn to snowboard.
  28. Go parasailing. (and not die)
  29. Start dying my hair again. (fun stuff, not just natural colors)
  30. Consider dreadlocks.
  31. See a play on Broadway.
  32. Learn how to cook something…complicated.
  33. Host a multi-course meal for family/friends and cook (almost) everything.
  34. Eat at a five-star restaurant. Order something exotic.
  35. Go camping on the beach.
  36. Do some sort of mission/relief work.
  37. Make a “Family Yearbook” every year.
  38. Have “professional” family photos taken every year.
  39. Develop family traditions for things like birthdays, Christmas, NYE, etc.
  40. Celebrate “40 Days of 40” and do all sorts of amazing things the 40 days leading up to my birthday.

What do you think?? What would you add/change/remove? Have you ever made any kind of “bucket list”? I don’t think I’m going to go beyond this and make a “50 Before 50” list… It would just have one thing on it: RETIRE EARLY. lol!


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I had a dream last night that my grandparents got to meet Wade. The entire family was at their house in Spring City. It was a beautiful sun-shiny summer day – the light was streaming in through the windows like whoa. Papaw was playing with Wade while Mom talked to Mamaw on the couch. I wanted to get a video but I didn’t want them to see me crying.

I’m tearing up now just thinking about it, lol! I woke up thinking that that must be what Heaven is like – bright and beautiful, surrounded by all your loved ones…

And then I felt guilty because it was just my mom’s parents and not my dad’s. Why were they left out, subconscious?? And then I started panicking because what if Wade had died? He has started sleeping on his stomach, and that study did just come out about how they shouldn’t do that before the age of one… *rushes to check baby monitor* And then of course I started thinking about how my parents are now the grandparents and one day they will die, and omg I really should call them.

It really was a great dream, even if reality kind of ruined it. >.<

Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply

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Just an FYI, I got Peter Pan® Simply Ground™ fo’ FREE through Influenster, in exchange for an honest review. If you want to give it a try, there is a limited supply of $1 off coupons you can download from the Peter Pan website.

I just had a sudden flashback.

My family used to camp at Harrison Bay every summer. Right about the time I really started to be able to form memories our family got too large and it was too complicated to try to organize trips like that, so we stopped. Which basically means there are pictures of me at Harrison Bay, but heck if I remember much about it. But! I’ve now had two sudden flashbacks. Yes, I had one in the middle of typing that last sentence. Because my brain is weird and irrational.

Memory #1: I stepped on a piece of glass and cut my foot pretty hardcore. You don’t care about that one so much. Memory #2: I saw my cousin eating peanut butter with a spoon. A SPOON. Straight out of the jar! Why I had never done that, I do not know. But it blew my fragile little mind. You probably don’t care about that too much, either. Do you eat peanut butter straight? I never really have. I’ll dip stuff in it, or make stuff with it. Anyway, not the point.

Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson BuzzSo the Simply Ground line from Peter Pan (I got honey-roasted) is new. It’s not quite creamy, but not quite crunchy, either. They say it’s easier to spread on bread (RHYMING), but I haven’t tested that statement. They also say the jar’s the right size/shape for dipping, and I did test that. It’s true! It’s a pretty shallow container, so you don’t have to worry about having to stick your hand down into the abyss. And it’s got a really wide top, so people with man hands can snack with ease. I also really dig the taste. I’ve been known to make peanut butter and honey sandwiches. Another good one – peanut butter and maple syrup. That tip’s on me. You’re welcome.

What’s that? You want a series of pictures documenting my first taste? WELL IF YOU INSIST.

Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson Buzz Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson Buzz
Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson Buzz Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson Buzz

I approve!

Like I said, I’m not big on eating peanut butter straight out of the jar – even though this was pretty tasty. I knew they said it was a good “snacking” PB, so I looked around Kroger for something easy to dip in it while at work.

Side note: Work snacks are the best snacks. A little blip of sunlight in an otherwise bleak day… ;) I’m being melodramatic because I’ve had a long week at work. TGIF, y’all. T.G.I.F.

Anyway, another flashback for you: a treat my mom would make that I haven’t had in AGES and now really wish I had fully prepped for was PB spread across graham crackers, with some mini marshmallows on top. Pop it in the microwave for a couple seconds and omg…heaven. I didn’t do all that (much regret now), but I did get some graham cracker “stix” from Kroger. AND I discovered another awesome feature of the container – tiny snack bowl!! Feel free to share that tip, Peter Pan. I’m quite proud of it.

Product Review: Peter Pan #SnackWithSimply | The Wilson BuzzAnywho, Peter Pan® Simply Ground™ is delicious and you should try it.

Thanks, Influenster! Thanks Peter Pan!

LBW: The Birth Story

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It’s been four months, guys… I’ll try to get it right, but I’ve slept once or twice since then. And more importantly – I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep since then!! Anyway, I’m going to try to recount the tale of the birth of LBW. In as much detail as I can remember, so it might cross over into TMI territory…we’ll see how it goes.

At our second ultrasound I swear the doctor said the due date was March 31. But I guess he didn’t update the chart. We went in for an appointment on March 30 and I was only dilated to 1cm. I had been at 1cm for three weeks. No Braxton-Hicks contractions or any other sign of labor. I did lose my mucus plug at some point, but apparently that doesn’t mean much. My doctor doesn’t let you stay pregnant past 41wks, so he brought up scheduling an induction for one week past our due date, which we told him was March 31. When he went to write it in his calendar he saw that the due date was actually April 3. So he said we could push the induction back longer if we wanted. Well…I had woken up around Week 38 or 39 and was done with being pregnant. DONE. So I said “No!” and we kept the April 6 induction date. I never had a single contraction until the hospital. LBW was in no hurry to greet the world.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

The last picture of us as a family of two! This was right after we got into our room at the hospital.

We had to check in around 9:00pm on April 5 to start the induction process. April 4 we had a chill night at home with the animals, watching TV and attempting to get a good night’s rest. April 5 we went to Olive Garden for dinner, then I think we might have gone to Books-A-Million? Finally we headed into the hospital. To start the induction process, they put this little pill called Cytotec up…me. It helps ripen the cervix and *could* kickstart labor. So I got one of those when I first got in, and then again at some point in the middle of the night. I also got an IV for the first time ever and omg it was the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. Worse even than labor, because it shouldn’t have been so bad. The girl tried 3 times before she called in someone else to do it. Mr. T’s cousin said they used a humongous needle – way bigger than necessary. AND IT WAS IN THE BACK OF MY HAND. Anyway, I had very – very – mild contractions throughout the night, but was able to sleep for most of it.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

Fracking IV hurt like a sunuvabitch.

I think around 8:00am they started the pitocin drip. They said I could get an epidural whenever I wanted, but at this point I felt fine so I said to wait. We were keeping our doula informed, but again – I felt fine – so she was holding off on coming to the hospital. Everyone kept telling me it would probably be hours before the show really got going. My parents showed up at some point in the morning…I’m not sure if it was before or after the epidural. I’ve already started to forget things. I’d say maybe around 10:00 or 11:00 I started to really feel the contractions. At that point I was approx 5cm dilated (that’s about halfway). They told me from that point on it’s about 1cm an hour, so the baby would probably be coming around dinnertime. I asked for an epidural and was then told that I actually had to wait until I’d gotten a full bag of fluids before I could get it. NO ONE TOLD ME THIS BEFORE. So that sucked. I stared that bag down as it slowly dripped. Mr. T took a picture of the hand prints on his arm where I was squeezing the crap out of it.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

I think Mr. T was showing my parents how to do stuff on an iPhone…maybe.

omg, you guys. Epidurals are amazing. I highly recommend them. HIGHLY. It didn’t hurt at all. And it brought glorious relief. I do have a redonk curve in my spine, though, so they were a bit worried that it might not take, or only partially work, or wear off too soon. Also, since you don’t feel contractions while you’re on an epidural it can slow labor down, so they try to keep you moving around. Or something like that. All I know is 45 min after I got it, they came in and rolled me over onto my left side. I had started to feel contractions again, which I thought was kind of strange. But they were super mild, kind of like what I’d felt through the night, so I figured maybe they were just so strong that they were pushing through the epidural, but it was a normal thing that happened.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

I’m pretty sure this was after the epidural had started to wear off. Holy crap, my neck has rolls for days.

Anyway, they rolled me on my left side so I could talk to Mom & Dad. The nurse checked on me after I’d been on my side for a few minutes, asking if I felt totally numb. I told her that I could kind of feel my right leg a little, so she decided I should be rolled over onto my right side. Maybe that makes the epidural juices trickle down? idk. I also mentioned that I was feeling a bit of pressure. She said that it’s pretty common to feel like you need to urinate, but if I ever felt the need to poop that might be cause for concern. At this point the contractions were getting pretty intense…almost back to when I’d started asking for an epidural. Almost as soon as the nurse walked out I was like…yeah, maybe get her back in here. I told Mr. T to tell our doula to head over.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

This is the last picture taken of me before shizz got real. No time for pictures until after LBW was born!

The nurse said that the epidural was probably just wearing off and would need to be adjusted, but she would check me again to make sure. She had me do a “test push” just to see how things were progressing. Almost immediately she was like “Okay…no more pushing. I need to get Dr. Williams here NOW.” Also, apparently in another delivery room some poor woman had been actively pushing for 30+ minutes and PULLED HER IV OUT THREE TIMES. Just…how? idk. But ALL the nursing staff were helping her. She ended up needing an emergency c-section. The next…maybe 15-30 minutes? Were just this poor woman telling me to NOT PUSH NO MATTER WHAT PLEASE JUST WAIT DR. WILLIAMS WILL BE HERE SOON and me thinking “God…I’d REALLY like to push, though…” She would spread my legs, check, then immediately push my knees back together and say “Okay, yeah….don’t push or the baby will get here before the doctor does.” So, yeah. THAT was a lot of fun.

And then Dr. Williams finally showed up and I could push and holy hell it hurt. I was like “I really thought epidurals would do more to block the pain” but now I’ve come to the realization that mine must have almost completely worn off because  people with working epidurals have told me they never really felt anything. I pushed through several contractions and omg I could feel EVERYTHING. It was like Dr. Williams was trying to stretch me open more (which he was) but omg it was not fun. I distinctly remember thinking “How about we get some lube down there, broski?” because it…well it did not feel good. And I would feel the head allllllllmost get out, but then the contraction would end and it would *ploop* disappear again. They kept insisting that I almost had it, but I think they just tell everyone that. The most unpleasant feeling, though – not the most painful, but the one that made me go “Oh, ew…” was the feeling of the rest of the body coming out. The head was the worst. Freaking stupid big-headed baby… But the rest of the body…I can’t explain it. It felt like a slimy tiny human body slid out of my vagina, is what it felt like. It was so gross. lol! So, so gross. I just shivered a little remembering it.

Of course, then they held the baby up and were all “it’s a boy!” and I made this god-awful sob/gasp noise, Mr. T cut the cord, and I got to hold Little Baby Wade for the first time. They tell you that you’re so caught up in holding the awesome new baby that you don’t even notice what happens next – that is a lie. I noticed it all. And it sucked. You have to deliver the placenta, which is gross. And they massage your stomach, which is fracking painful. Then they stitch you up. Somehow – SOMEHOW – even with my giant baby and crazy fast delivery I didn’t have any external tearing. But! I think the internal damage was pretty significant, because he was still down there stitching for a long time. It was not fun. I think they were worried about how much I bled. I know I was…I definitely had these random thoughts about dying in the middle of labor and how Mr. T would have to raise the baby on his own. It’s weird how you have time to think all these random thoughts. It doesn’t seem like you will, but you do. I did get really lucky with the lack of external damage, though. Really, really lucky.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz


A few other things to note about recovery… My stomach felt SO WEIRD for the next week or two. Because it doesn’t go away immediately, which everyone tells you. I knew to expect to still look pregnant…but I didn’t think about the fact that there would just be all this empty space, and everything that was compressed would suddenly have all this extra room. I felt hollow and bizarre. And they kept doing the stomach massages. They kept hurting. And all this blood would squish out when they did it. Oh it was so gross. Plus they left my IV in, which blew. I finally asked someone if they could take it out sometime around 3:00am and she did. Then it bled like a stuck pig for like 30 minutes. It was ridiculous.

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

My sad, stretch-mark covered stomach and the creature that did it to me. <3

Oh, and LBW’s stomach was full of amniotic fluid, which I guess happens. He projectile vomited this horrific black liquid several times. He also refused to nurse for probably a good 12+ hours. That (plus an undiagnosed for two-months tongue tie) caused his weight to drop nearly a full pound from birth to when we left the hospital. That turned into a two-month nightmare…but that’s a story for another post. lol!

LBW: The Birth Story | The Wilson Buzz

The happy family in our first week back home.

30 Before 30: Year 28

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I turned 28 last week – time to check in on my 30 Before 30 list!

1. Have a Kid

07/27/16: We successfully gave birth to a Wilson spawn. Go us! Wade is…everything.
11/21/15: Ha! Psych! We were totally trying to conceive when I posted back in July! SUCK IT. I’m so sneaky… I actually might have been pregnant when I made that post, come to think of it… Ah, maybe not. I just punched the numbers in on a due date calculator. Only do that if you want to try to imagine the exact date we were getting freaky in the sheetsy. I actually just did that with MY birth date, and I might have been a Halloween baby…unsettling.
07/02/15: I don’t want to talk about it. KIDS ARE TERRIFYING.

2. Home Renovation

  1. reading nook: Yeah, there has been zero progress on the nook. Actually, negative progress, because it’s full of junk and I think Mr. T used the lumber he’d bought for it to work on other projects.
  2. hardwood floors: The painted concrete is holding up pretty well, and Mr. T installed laminate flooring upstairs on his own, after a friend of ours taught him what’s up.
  3. nursery: Oh I need to blog about the nursery. I mean, it’s not finished by a long shot, and LBW is already four months old, but still. Cool stuff has happened.
  4. bedroom: Psh, whatever. At least we sleep in it again. For a month or two we didn’t even do that. Not because it was messy or anything, just…baby stuff.
  5. living room: Mr. T built shelves! And we bought new furniture! It’s going in a totally different direction than I’d planned, but I’m digging it!!
  1. reading nook: So we’ve been working on the reading nook. It’s painted! I never blogged about that! I’ll do it soon! And Mr. T bought some lumber to begin making the shelves!! So hooray!
  2. hardwood floors: We’ve ripped up all the carpet downstairs (another blog I need to write) and instead of getting any other type of flooring, we’re just painting them! Temporary solution!! But I have met with a contractor to get a quote for flooring upstairs! Holy crap that’s going to be expensive!!! Hooray!!
  3. nursery: We currently have a roommate in our eventual nursery (long story) but he shouldn’t be there super long…and he’ll definitely be gone by the time LBW makes an appearance.
  4. bedroom: I mean…not much has happened since the last time I blogged about the bedroom. But! We’re getting new floors in there as well, so there’s that! Maybe that will be motivation to, if nothing else, keep it clean.
  5. living room: There is quite a bit of reno going on in the living room right now. The floors are coming out, obviously, but that means we’re getting rugs, because *brr…* concrete floors! We also painted, because why not? We ripped the carpet up! It was actually a lot of fun NOT worrying about getting paint on the carpet. :) And omg it looks so much better. So much better. I highly recommend clicking on that blog link and looking at some pictures. It. is. glorious.

So, yeah – I think we’re doing okay on this goal. :)

07/02/15: Could you spread the word about my blog? How many readers do you have to have before companies start sending you free stuff? So many blogs I read are all “While this post isn’t ‘sponsored’, Lowe’s generously sent us the majority of what we needed to build this bad boy… and we’re suuuuper grateful!” (that’s a direct quote, fyi) and no one has ever offered me anything for free, sponsored post or not. I occasionally get stuff from BzzAgent, but that’s not the same. This woman was donated a metric butt-ton of lumber to build her kids a playground.

Anyway – things I want to work on (and yes, I keep changing them):

  1. reading nook
  2. hardwood floors
  3. nursery
  4. bedroom
  5. living room

3. Cookbook with 20 Recipes

07/27/16: I haven’t even cooked in the past four months, much less recorded any recipes.
11/2115: Psh, yeah – totally didn’t do anything with that list from imgur. I did just rediscover a OneNote cookbook I had started in our Dropbox. I’ll see what recipes I have in there already. I’ve got an amazeballs potato soup recipe I need to add.
07/02/15: I actually just found a really cool list of recipes on imgur that I think I’m going to try in a new blog series. But I still need to buy a cook book to record recipes in… I have a few that I want to write down!

4. Work Out Regularly

07/27/16: I just bought a “Pilates for Weight Loss” DVD. Wonder when I’m gonna find the time to do that?
11/21/15: Oh, right… I’ve been meaning to look up some good yoga videos for pregnant women. Oops.
07/02/15: I’ve started walking/jogging on Tuesdays and Thursdays with a coworker. And I’ve started a YouTube series called 30 Days of Yoga. Still looking for some kind of workout that is more intense but not tedious or boring (or too hard and makes me give up).

5. Travel Outside the US

07/27/16: If Trump is elected President, we may just freaking move to Canada. So there’s that. lol!
11/21/15: Maybe we can go to Canada? >.< There is a tattoo artist I’d love to work with up there. I’m far too lazy to try to track him down right now, though. So no link for you.
07/02/15: Okay, this was the year that was supposed to happen. And we aren’t going to Costa Rica for our anniversary. :( Money’s too tight with the whole “opening a tattoo shop” thing that happened earlier this year. But Two-Tone is rockin, so that’s awesome. I just don’t know that we’ll be taking any international trips in the next 3 years.

6. Be Debt Free & Start Investing

07/27/16: I just had to un-cross-out (that’s a word, shut up) the “debt free” bit, because…well, because of #7.
11/21/15: Still no debt! Kind of. But we might end up needing to take out a loan for the flooring upstairs. :\ Haven’t started investing yet, either. Our financial adviser recommended building up some savings thanks to the impending LBW.
07/02/15: Well we’re debt free! And we have met with a financial adviser a handful of times, so we might start investing soon!

7. New Car

07/27/16: Well it was “new car” then it was “scooter” and now it’s back to “new car” just so I can cross it off. I wrecked my car in December and we had to buy a new one! >.<
11/21/15: I still want a scooter, darnit!
07/02/15: I’m changing #7. I want a scooter, darnit.

8. Own a Camper

07/27/16: Still holding out for this…one day.
11/21/15: Ugh… Now Mr. T wants to buy a freakin’ SCHOOL BUS and turn it into an RV. I do love that man, and all his wild dreams.
07/02/15: Other than Mr. T and I having disagreements on what kind of camper we want (I want a pull-behind, he wants a full-on RV), the only reason we haven’t done this is $$. Oh, and storage. Neither of us wants a pop-up. But I don’t know if we could fit a legit camper in our garage.

9. DIY Home Decor

11/21/15: We DIY so much stuff. We’re DIY kings. I mean…it’s not super well-done DIY, but it’s DIY!! I’m totally going to cross this off the list. I’ll uncross it if I ever think we’ve gotten lazy.
07/02/15: I’m really bad at making bucket lists, I think. These are all so vague. I tried to make this one more specific by saying have at least three DIY decor items in each (commonly used) room. If paintings count we’re so done on this. lol! We have paintings everywhere.

10. Watch The Office

07/27/16: Dude, I’ve watched SO MUCH Netflix/Hulu since LBW was born. I couldn’t even begin to tell you all the shows I’ve seen now. What a waste of life, lol.
07/02/15: I did this! I’ve also watched all of Scrubs. And Friends. I’m good at binging on Netflix, but not much else, apparently.

11. Develop Software

07/27/16: Whoops.
11/21/15: Oops, haven’t done anything toward this yet. My bad.
07/02/15: I’m changing this one. Initially I wanted to develop my own website for this blog, but at this point that’s just silly. WordPress works fine. So now I’m going to say I want to develop software for Two-Tone. Mr. T has been asking for a client-tracking program for ages, so I should do that for him.

12. Learn to Sew

07/27/16: This still hasn’t happened. I even own a sewing machine that has never been taken out of the box.
11/21/15: Kid stuff is expensive. I want to learn how to make some of it. So I need to learn to sew.

13. Read 400 Books

07/27/16: I ended up reading 54 books in 2015, if you can trust my Goodreads bookshelves. So far in 2016 I’ve read…NONE. How did I get 55 in the last update? Whatever… I need to read 155 by the end of 2018. Crap. I guess children’s books don’t count?
11/21/15: Apparently I’ve read 55 so far this year. So that puts me at 246, so by the end of 2018 I need to read…154.
07/02/15: By the end of 2014 I’d read 191. So far this year I’ve read 39. That’s 230. I need to read 170 books by the end of 2018.

14. Tattoos

07/27/16: Yeah, still nothing new due to the baby. But I might have something brewing…
11/21/15: Mr. T did start going back into my giraffe, and he’s done a little bit with my garter, but getting knocked up (and then wanting to breast feed) kind of put a hold on any tattoo plans. Plus I’m still wishy-washy on what exactly I want my sleeve to look like. I don’t trust myself until I’ve be settled in on one idea for several months, and that hasn’t really happened with the sleeve.
  • completed sleeve
  • updated apprentice tattoos
    1. giraffe
    2. steampunk
    3. garter
  • Ghostbusters tattoo

15. Open Two-Tone Tattoo Parlor / Secure Nest Egg

07/27/16: Mr. T hasn’t been able to hit his nest egg goal yet, but he kept us afloat while I was on maternity leave, AND he has three employees! I love that man.
11/21/15: Mr. T got pretty darn close to his goal for the nest egg. But then we kind of needed him to bring in a paycheck. And then he took on one, then another, apprentice. So he had to do some construction. He got super down on himself for not reaching his goal, but I’m really freaking proud of his cute little booty and all he’s accomplished.
07/02/15: I tweaked this one a little bit. We opened Two-Tone in February, and Mr. T has a goal of raising a certain amount of money into a nest egg for the company before he starts taking any income. He’s a little over halfway there!

16. Fix Bike / Bike 30 Miles

07/27/16: I haven’t ridden my bike since the early early days of my pregnancy. We were going to ride around a couple weeks ago but all the tires were flat, and we couldn’t find the pump.
11/21/15: Are you allowed to ride bikes while pregnant? It’s going to be too cold, and then I’ll be way too pregnant, for it to matter. Some super awesome friends of ours bought us one of those little carts to pull a baby behind a bike. I mean…I probably won’t be using it, but Mr. T can. And I can bike along behind! Maybe the extra weight/bulk will slow him down to my level, too…
07/02/15: My bike is fixed! Now I just need to map out my route and start training. :)

17. Strive for Contentment

07/27/16: I’m still here, and enjoy the work for the most part. I don’t really know how I will ever consider my career “advanced” while here, because it’s not like I can rise in the ranks. Unless my boss leaves, which he should never ever do. Ever. I’m going to change this from “Advance My Career” to “Strive for Contentment” and cross it off. As long as I’m happy, this is resolved. If I’m not happy, I’ll look for a new position or work on my attitude. :)
11/21/15: Miss C totally works at the company that screwed me over. lol! They didn’t go under!! But I’m very glad they didn’t hire me. She works in the factory and loves her job, so I’m happy for her. That doesn’t mean I trust them. >.>

At any rate, things have improved at my old/current job. Not that they were really bad before. But I have taken on more/different responsibilities and hopefully I’m not screwing it up too badly and won’t get fired. They wouldn’t fire me, would they?! Nah…

07/02/15: Okay, so I actually tried to quit my job and start a new one. But, umm…disaster struck. The company that supposedly was hiring me is shutting down, I think. Either way, I’m still at my current job. But! This whole experience has caused what I hope will be improvements at my current work. I’m theoretically going to transition into being more than just a web developer. Fingers crossed!

18. Road Trip

07/27/16: Where on earth could we go?
11/21/15: Mr. T totally wanted to go to Florida this year. And we totally could have counted that as our road trip. But what’s more fun than taking a road trip with a tiny baby?! Good thing we didn’t go, so we get to do it with LBW. ;)
07/02/15: First we buy the camper, then we go on a road trip. I’m so excited about this!!

19. Sex

11/21/15: I mean…we didn’t make it the full month, but we did make a baby. So I’m gonna call this one a win. Heh.
07/02/15: Alright. tmi? This is the month. I’m gonna do it. Every day in July that we’re able, we’re gonna get it on like Marvin Gaye.

20. Ditch the Roommates

07/27/16: Everyone was gone by the time LBW was born!!
11/21/15: OH MY GOD IT’S EVEN WORSE NOW. We have two roommates. We can’t start on the nursery yet!! I’M DYING. DYYYYYYYYING. The nesting phase is real, y’all.
07/02/15: Okay, so we’ve regressed. We have a roommate again. Oops.

21. Hang Wedding Photos

07/27/16: Oh right…
11/21/15: Oh, yeah. That’s still a thing we need to do. Maybe we’ll get some in the living room and/or bedrooms. Maybe even something in the nursery, perhaps?
07/02/15: This used to be shooting a steampunk photo shoot, but I’ve given up on that dream. Banana and I started on the outfit…but I’m pretty sure the measurements she took are no longer accurate. And we really need to frame/hang wedding photos.

22. Go Green

07/27/16: Umm…
11/21/15: Oh, yeah… I’ve forgotten so many of these things! >.<
07/02/15: I want to cut out paper towels, and make my own cleaning supplies.

23. Yearly Photo Album

07/27/16: Oh, oh, oh – I only have like…a handful of pictures that need to be added and I’ll be done! Of course, it costs like $150. Maybe we can actually order it one day…
11/21/15: I did start this! I did, I did! Aren’t you proud of me? 8}
07/02/15: I’m going to start this this year, on our anniversary.

24. Grow Hair Out

07/27/16: I just changed this from “Learn Hairstyles” to “Grow Hair Out”. #dealwithit
11/21/15: Ugh. My hair is long enough now that I don’t even straighten it anymore. I’ve regressed.
07/02/15: I need to learn how to braid my hair. And maybe how to floof it up into an awesome messy mohawk.

25. Get Cultured

07/27/16: I bought Mr. T tickets for the Pilgrimage Festival for his birthday this year. The lineup is so-so, but it’s close to home, in the fall, and on the weekend. We can take LBW and hopefully have a good time with low-stress.

2013: Bonnaroo
2014: Bonnaroo
2015: Bonnaroo
2016: Pilgrimage Music & Art Festival
2017: ??
2018: ??

11/21/15: 2013: Bonnaroo
2014: Bonnaroo
2015: Bonnaroo
2016: ??
2017: ??
2018: ??
07/02/15: Attend at least one major art/music thing every year. The past three years we’ve gone to Bonnaroo. We’ll see what happens in the coming years.

26. Family Tree Gallery Wall

07/27/16: I’m changing this from the vague “Gallery Walls” that it was before to “Family Tree Gallery Wall” to indicate doing the string art/gallery wall thing up the stairs.
11/21/15: I wonder when I’ll consider this done?
07/02/15: We’ve done a pretty decent job of filling our living room and bedroom with art. I’d like for it to be a bit more purposeful. And, you know, framed… I also want to do a string art/gallery wall going up the stairs that has a bunch of family photos.

27. Fancy Feast

07/27/16: The first place we went to eat without LBW was Camino Real, the Mexican restaurant near our house. Woo… (That doesn’t count, in case you were confused.) This stays on the list!
11/21/15: Mmm… Maybe we can make this our first date night after LBW is born? Or…maybe 5th or 6th, so we’re more comfortable going out without ze beebs, so I don’t have a breakdown and make us go home BECAUSE I JUST MISS HIM/HER SO DAD-GUM MUCH.
07/02/15: No, not cat food. I want to go somewhere reaaaaaaally nice and have an expensive, delicious dinner. Maybe one of those places that cooks the really weird food, like they cook on the reality shows (the cooking ones, not Fear Factor). Especially one where the chef is all “This is what I’m cooking – eat it!” so I don’t have to make any decisions.

28. Make Something…Challenging

07/27/16: I’ll get right on that.
11/21/15: More than just crafts or sewing…not that those aren’t “challenging” – but more something that involves power tools and “measuring twice, cutting once”. A piece of furniture or something.
07/02/15: Help me come up with three more things to do. I didn’t like the last three on my list. Too vague. Oh, and I need to change #12, too. Halp me.

29. Come up with an even longer list!

07/27/16: I have a few ideas, but I haven’t actually typed anything up yet.
11/21/15: Ha! Considering I’ve been working on this list for two years and am still struggling to finish this list, I like the idea of forcing future me to sit down and make a “40 before 40” list. Mwahahaha…

30. Have a Bangin’ 30th Birthday Party

07/27/16: FYI – for Mr. T’s birthday this year we’re having a chill cook-out at a friend’s house. Still no clue what I want to do, but I’ve got just under two years to figure it out.
11/21/15: What sort of party should I have?! Should we go out? Should we stay in? Should there be a theme? Yes kids? No kids? Travel? Dress up fancy? PAJAMA PARTY?! I just don’t know… I guess I’ve got, what…3.5 years? Is that right? My math skills are seriously failing me. I also had to double-check that I’m 27. For a brief moment I thought I was 28. >.<


What am I going to do for his?!

07/02/15: Aw yiss.


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Wade Wilson!

wade-wilson-20160709You guys, my baby’s almost four months old. I haven’t written a blog post in ages because frickin babies are exhausting!! We have had a roller coaster of a time these past few months. I plan on writing about it all soon. I’ve been meaning to for at least the past month. The first couple months I didn’t even consider it, because all I could focus on was getting through the day. lol! Anyway, I plan on at least getting the birth story out, and a bit of a rambling tale about our attempt to breastfeed. So there’s something to look forward to!

And yes, we named our child after Deadpool.

Home Tour 2016

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It’s home tour time, beeches!!
Actually, it’s way past home tour time. But I got to it when I got to it, okay? I’ve kept cleaning, then getting messy, then cleaning, then getting messy. And the entire house has never been totally clean all at the same time since the moment right before we walked in with our boxes. We’ve also had roommates, so it’s been difficult to find time when I’m home alone, not to mention I’m not gonna film rooms that someone else is living in. I didn’t bother watching last year’s video before I start rolling. And I didn’t watch the video before I started uploading it to YouTube. God knows what all I said. I’m actually watching last year’s video as I wait for this one to upload, and keep thinking “Oh, right…I should’ve said something about that.” My bad. Oh, sweet past Sarah had so many plans. It’s crazy to see how much has changed in the past year! And how much hasn’t… I’m pretty amused by how much I apologized for the messy house, compared to what things look like now and I’m just like “whatevs” – God knows what it will look like NEXT year, when I’ve got a child!!

Anywho, here’s the video:

Morning Person 2016 – Lesson 9

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Lesson 9: Get Some Headspace

Meditation provides a framework in which we are able to step back from habitual thinking and emotions, so that we can witness them with clarity and perspective. When we learn to do this, the mind begins to calm down, as does the body. In turn we experience more quiet and a greater sense of ease in every area of life. It is a remarkable shift in perspective, which really needs to be experienced, rather than explained. It is with this shift that we are able to make healthier choices in our daily routine.

How do we balance what we want to do, with all the things we have to do? How do make time for the things that matter?

How to meditate in six easy steps:

  1. Get settled – Find a quiet place where you can relax.
  2. Breathe deeply – Take five deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. On the last exhalation, close your eyes.
  3. Check in – Settle in to your body, taking note of your posture and how your body feels, and any emotion you might be experiencing.
  4. Scan your body – Turn your mind inwards and take note of your body from head to toe, acknowledging any tension or discomfort and then scan again noticing parts of your body that start to relax.
  5. Observe your breath – Bring your attention to your breathing and start to count your breaths. One, in, two, out and so on, up to 10.
  6. Allow your mind to be free – After a few minutes, give yourself a minute for your mind to be completely free. If it wants to think, let it think. If it wants to be busy, let it be busy. Let the mind do whatever it wants to do. After a minute or so, open your eyes, and appreciate the feeling that getting a little headspace can produce.

This assignment is from “Becoming a Morning Person” by Little Green Dot

We had our first birthing class on Sunday, and one of the things we did was a relaxation method that was pretty similar to this. She recommended doing it regularly to help me get in tune with my body so I can more easily relax while I’m in labor. Or…relax as much as possible as my body absolutely falls apart and a human emerges from my nether regions. *shiver

So, yeah – I should probably do this! The trick will be not falling asleep after having my eyes closed for that long, and remembering all the steps. Oh, hey – I just noticed that the email includes a link to download a meditation app. Well there you go. I’ll give it a shot and let you know how well I do! Oh, and as far as a check-in for the previous lessons…

  • Lesson 8 – diet, I haven’t started on this one yet. Next week!
  • Lesson 7 – yoga, Oh. Oops. I did the leg cramp one, which was nice! And I made it most of the way through the “Preparing for Birth” one…and then my phone died. >.< I’ll get back on this tomorrow morning and try out the “Releasing the Spine” video, because my back is getting tired, son!
  • Lesson 6 – mindfulness, I did put the note on my mirror. It says grateful / impact / focus. I definitely don’t spend 3 minutes thinking about it, though. And I had forgotten what “focus” was for. >.<
  • Lesson 5 – snooze, So I do still hit snooze fairly regularly… But I’m about 50/50 on stretching!! I have to be really careful about it, though, or my legs will cramp. >.> Which is probably a good indicator that I need to be doing my yoga videos!!
  • Lesson 4 – sleep hygiene, I’m still using that app that I downloaded. I keep the bedroom so cool that Mr. T freezes at night. Seriously – I’m under a sheet and he’s got a sheet, blanket, and either a jacket or bath robe. lol! Oh, and we have a sound machine now. My sister got one for us (mainly LBW).
  • Lesson 3 – sleep journal, I didn’t even last two days on this one. sorrynotsorry
  • Lesson 2 – roadblocks, Well…my roadblock fix was to change my alarm so I could hit snooze more…then Lesson 5 told me to stop hitting snooze! That app goes off anywhere between 5:30 and 6:00 so I’m going to renew my goal of not hitting snooze and waking up whenever it thinks is best. And then stretching. And doing yoga.
  • Lesson 1 – goal, My goal was to get out the door by 7:20am, and I’ve done a pretty good job of that!! Go me. :)

Morning Person 2016 – Lesson 8

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Lesson 8: Mindful Nutrition

When your body is not nourished, feeling drained, or taxed by bad food choices – it shows. You feel lethargic, it’s harder to concentrate and you may even feel down and negative about life. If you want to feel vibrant, clean, fresh, capable with energy and gusto for life – your everyday food choices make all the difference.

How do you start to eat for your body, to feel your best?

  1. Eat nutrient-dense food, close to nature.
  2. Upgrade your breakfast – strive for a balanced breakfast of carbohydrates, lean protein and fat.
  3. Feed your brain – aim for at least 1 rich source of foods high in omega 3’s every day…like salmon, walnuts, spinach, kale, or kiwi.

When it comes to being a morning person, you’ll notice that a well nourished body has more energy to get up, get moving and sustaining throughout the day. So mindful nutrition is not about resisting temptation – it’s about being aware the food choices you make throughout the day. Often when we think about healthy eating, the first thought is eliminating the bad. Not only is this not sustainable  – the “I’ll never eat that food again” mentality never lasts – but it puts all of your focus on the very thing you don’t want.

Start thinking in terms of more:

  • What can you do to include more whole foods in your meal?
  • What’s one small change that you can make everyday, to put the focus on giving your body more nourishment?

Make a plan this week to upgrade one meal every day.

This assignment is from “Becoming a Morning Person” by Little Green Dot

I think the easiest meal to upgrade would be my lunch. What exactly I should upgrade it to, though…I’m not sure. Also, it’s already Tuesday and I’m working from home on Friday. So I think I should strategize my lunches for next week rather than this week. This week is already lost. Maybe I’ll get some good trail mix to snack on…make sure it’s got walnuts and dried kiwi in it. Eh? Eh? Oh blech…do you know what has a lot of Omega 3s? Nasty stuff is what. Flax seed is easy to add to stuff…but what should I eat? I really don’t enjoy salads and they’re a huge hassle. Plus everything goes bad way too quickly. Maybe some sort of sandwich? But I’m not really supposed to have deli meats while I’m pregnant. I just Googled “healthy lunches to take to work” and the first list I pulled up…80% salads. >.<

I did find a few things I might try next week, though:

I’ve missed at least one week of crock pot recipes, too… :\ I did buy some frozen stuff at the grocery store, though! We’ve got a couple of lasagnas and some frozen meals for two tucked away in our freezer.