BioShock: Infinite, Day 6

Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5

Day 6

OMGIBEATITIBEATITIBEATIT! ITISOVERANDIWILLNEVERPLAYITAGAIN!!

Yeah, I’m not one of those people that likes to go back in and get all the stuff I missed. I BEAT THIS MOTHERF*CKING GAME AND I WILL NEVER PLAY IT AGAIN. Gah, I’m so happy right now! So. Happy.

I finally switched over to easy. It was friggin hard, okay? I’m not going to TELL YOU how many times I died even after that. I threw the controller at one point. I swore. Mr. T feared for his life. But! I beat that mother. f*cking. game. Alright, so for the wrap up…

After I FINALLY defeated the Vox it told me to meet Elizabeth at the bow of the airship. This is when I learned I had no idea where the bow of a ship was and spent about 5 minutes wandering about like a fool. IT WASN’T THAT BIG OF A SPACE. Anyway, we tell the big bird thing to kill the big tower thing that was restricting Elizabeth’s power (may have never mentioned that). But I dropped the little music player that controlled him so he came to attack us and she was all “OPEN DA RIP” and we were underwater and he drowned slowly and sadly. BUT THAT WOULDN’T BE THE SADDEST THING TO HAPPEN.

I’m guessing the underwater world is from the original BioShock. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get around to that one. But, yeah, Elizabeth goes on and on about how she can see everything now and there are all these doors that lead to infinite worlds where exactly similar things happen. THERE ARE ABOUT TO BE A LOT OF MAJOR SPOILERS.

So we go to where I’m getting baptized. (Right?) And I’m all “What’s the point of this?!” and then we’re in my office and dude’s all “Give us the kid to erase your debt!” and I’m all “What, there is no kid?” BUT THERE TOTALLY IS A KID. (Do you see what’s happening?) Yeah, I sold my daughter Anna to Comstock (the false prophet) to get out of debt. MUST HAVE BEEN A LOT OF DEBT, EH!? Dave Ramsey would be pissed. But wait – there’s more!

HERE ARE SUPER DUPER SPOILERS THAT YOU MAY NOT WANT TO KNOW IF YOU’RE GOING TO PLAY THIS GAME, BUT BY EVEN MENTIONING THAT THERE ARE SPOILERS I MAY HAVE MADE YOUR BRAIN START THINKING SO YOU’LL FIGURE THEM OUT ON YOUR OWN. BASICALLY I HOPE MY FIRST “SPOILERS” WARNING DETERRED YOU AT THIS POINT, BECAUSE NOW IT’S PROBABLY TOO LATE. OKAY HERE WE GO: I AM COMSTOCK!

They explain it more eloquently, but that’s the gist of it. That baptism scene – if I get baptized it creates a reality where I become Comstock. If I don’t get baptized I become the Booker that gives his daughter TO Comstock to pay off the debt. So the only way to stop it is to have like 5 alternate realities of my daughter drown me pre-baptism. Which…now I’m wondering if I got baptized…well, no – because Comstock couldn’t have existed before I had her. I hope there is a mother in the picture, or she’s probably going to die before anyone realizes I’m gone. And where are the witnesses for this bizarro murder? I’ve gotten off topic. The point is I’m Comstock and five iterations of my daughter killed me to prevent me from destroying the world.

It ended and now I’m sad. And yet so, so happy. So happy! Stay tuned for my next game! I’m going more lightweight this time. I need a break…


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